Sundays. Inevitably, even through the hectic weekends, Sundays bring a pause. A pause of reflection, a space for growth, a space for grace…
And this is why I write to you today. To reflect on this unspoken but prevalent act that we both do, as women.
Self punishment.
Now, your version of it may be in the minutiae, like not giving yourself dessert because when you were hungry you ate something “naughty”, or to the severe – like breaking your phone so you cant speak to anyone because you’re “so stupid”.
There are many sides and variations to this secret society that we all seem to be a part of. Our membership to this club seems to have come from birth. From the point of recognition of your sex, you were taught the principles of this secret society…and you, me, all of us, were taught to unquestioningly abide by its principles.
There were the mavericks amongst us sure, who unabashedly rejected these principles and sought to live their life without it – but that doesn’t stop society from pushing it’s ideals on you…
The status quo taught you to punish yourself – because they believed there was something about you that was, and still is, inherently wrong and needed to be punished.
But what if that wasn’t true?
Like someone getting a prison sentence for a wrongful conviction - you’ve placed yourself in an emotional prison, and you’re doing the time....but you didn't do the crime.
They may have placed loads of evidence in front of you… convincing evidence at that.. but the truth of the matter is, you are so worthy of love, and you do not need to be in this emotional lockdown suffering anymore.
You do not need to hate any part of your body. You do not need to have a flaw. You do not have to have something bad about you in order to connect and socialise with another person. You don’t need to dislike your mind.. your accent… the way you move… the way you think.. the way you socialise…
No part of you needs to be hated.
So I have just one, radical question for you now, love.
The question here is, what would your life look like if you never punished yourself?
If instead of depriving yourself, you gave yourself more love? More understanding… more compassion… more grace.
What would your life look like if you swapped self-punishment for total grace?
Sit with this visual today…
Breathe it in, and witness it unfold within your body.
Witness not the panic of all hell breaking loose, but the truth of love warming and covering you like a protective blanket.
Witness your best friend telling you that you’re amazing.
Witness the feeling of love filling you from your toes to the tips of your head.
My love, there is nothing about you that is wrong.
There is nothing about you that needs to be fixed.
There is nothing about you that is not perfection.
What would nature become if all the trees in the forest cut themselves down because they didnt have “perfect” branches?
Perfect for whom?
Girl.
There is nothing about you that needs to be fixed.
Shine. It is nautral to you – even if the feeling is a bit rusty. Shine.
Now shine deeper…shine brighter…and let it flood your body.
My Powerful Woman.
You powerful Dragon.
Give yourself the beautiful gift of grace this week.
Hug yourself deeper when things don’t go exactly as you planned it. From ordering the wrong latte, to simply forgetting your keys.
Give yourself the grace that you’d lend to a best friend, or a child now learning to walk.
Give yourself that gift this week.
And watch as your life begins to fill with more luscious experiences.
Sending you lots of love!
Till next Sunday
xx
